I’m getting married in 5 months. It’s pretty crazy. I can’t wait.

Things are going well. We’re getting things figured out slowly, one checked box at a time. Both of our families are helping out in a massive way, and it’s making it easy to have things we want. Ashley’s amazingly good at artsy craftsy things. She’s making so many decorations for the wedding and it’s awe inspiring. She’s amazing.

Still working at the RadioShack kiosk in the Lloyd Center. The manager just gave his two weeks so things are going to get pretty relaxed. I’m excited for it. Also, I’ve been on my way to getting a job at At&t. There’s a full time position available at the store in the mall and I know 2 people that already work there so hopefully I have enough of a hook up that I become a shoe-in for the position. I’m ready to get out of The Shack and they make waaaaaayyyyy more money at At&t. It’s a no brainer.

I’m excited to get out of my apartment and find somewhere else. I’m not going to actually be searching until the beginning of January, but I’ve check a few places online and it makes me excited. I’m just ready to live somewhere on the east side because parking is free and I could get myself a car. I’d love to have a car. Although, if we live somewhere close to one of our works we could just keep Ashley’s car as the sole vehicle in the relationship. Who knows. It all depends on where we end up. 

Oh well, just thought I’d throw an update here. 

That is all.

I am an engaged man.

In less than 7 months, I will be a married man. 

I couldn’t be happier. She’s amazing. She’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a woman and so much more. I think some guys would be a little nervous or anxious about getting married at my age, but when I think about who I’m getting married to I feel so at peace. She’s my best friend. We’ve got God at the forefront and it makes things so easy.

Forgiveness is easy to give when you know Jesus. 

Sure, there’s a lot of planning to happen, but we’ve got things under control. She’s got people meeting with people and a checklist of things we need to get done. We’re on track for the most part. We’ve each got great parents that are supporting both in spirit and financially. It’s great.

It’ll be a good wedding. 

She’s so creative. 

I love her. I love her a lot.

Well hello,

I’m pretty excited, and here’s why: I just borrowed money from my dad to purchase myself a moped. That’s right, I’m going mobile. No longer will I have to worry about bus routes or max times. No longer will I have to bother my girlfriend with driving to pick me up or make her come over to my house. I can ride to work, church, girlfriend’s house, and everything else. I can call up my friend Greg and say something like, “Yo, Greg, lets go grab a beer. I’ll meet you there.” AND THEN DRIVE MY MOPED TO MEET HIM!!!! I can go grocery shopping and hold a little more than what I could previously (I realize this isn’t too great of an accomplishment but even the little things count). 

Other than the great, lovely, outstanding news of a soon to be moped purchase, the rest of life is going alright. Things with my lady couldn’t be better. I’m absolutely in love with her and it’s been fantastic having her here in P-Town. I think once I’m mobile I’m really going to love living in Portland, even more than I already love it. You know what you can’t do comfortably in Vegas? Ride a moped around in the summer. You’d melt there. Literally. You’d get about ten feet and instantly be reduced to a pool of sludge left on the pavement… probably bubbling sludge because the pavement works like a stove top. 

Ma’ lady and I haven’t gotten in a fight yet. Like a “I’m not talking to you right now because I’m mad at you” kind of fight. I don’t know if it should’ve happened by now, but it could never happen and I’d be happy. She’s amazing. Even when I do something to piss her off a little bit, we make up almost instantly. I hate being in an argument with someone and not resolving the conflict as soon as possible. We get along pretty much perfectly, except when I’m being silly and ridiculous. She gets embarrassed easily. I’ll start dancing or singing in a grocery store and she’ll flee from me… she’ll get used to it.

Work is still lame. I’m trying to get transferred right now because the store is getting overwhelmingly feminine. I don’t have anything against the ladies, but as of now there are only 2 males working there, including myself. And the other guy only works a few nights a week so I barely see him. Most of the time I’m trapped with ladies all day and I’m pretty sure they’re banding their woman powers together and will soon place me in the center. I’ll be attacked by a barrage of tampax, bras and lip gloss until I’m killed. I see it in my head when I close my eyes (maybe not, but I like being dramatic). But really, I do love a few of the girls I work with, they’re fun. There are a couple of women I work with that I could do without ever seeing again. Especially this one old lady who’s like 5000 years old and shouldn’t be working there. I swear she somehow lived through the ice age and the world just can’t shake her!!!!! She’s a leech!!!! She needs to be put down!! Somehow, some way she will be stopped!!!! (being dramatic again)

It’s weird. I listen to such a broad spectrum of music. The last song I listened to was Perpetuum Mobile by The Penguin Orchestra Cafe, which is almost a classical instrumental, and now I’m listening to the Tron soundtrack, which is like Industrial Techno. It’s random. I’m random. I love it.

Well hello again,

It’s been awhile hasn’t it? I got a little distracted. A lot has happened. Where to begin….

Well, I’m not playing poker anymore. It’s not because I don’t appreciate the game anymore, but because the rest of my life is headed in a different, in my opinion better, direction. Not only that, but the internet poker world is kind of shut down right now and might never resurface. I’m working at RadioShack which makes me feel like a teenager. It’s such a laid back job and I’ve got it in so good with my boss that I really should take advantage of it. It’s hourly plus commission so there’s always incentive to actually work when I want to. I just work there part time, and it’s just barely making the bills so I’ll continue to be broke, like I’ve been most of my life. Oh well. 

It Portland there are a lot more “weirdo” customers that come into a Starbucks. Thank goodness I don’t work there anymore, and God bless my girlfriend who does.

Speaking of my girlfriend, she moved here! It’s absolutely amazing. She’s awesome and I get to see her just about every day. I don’t know how I scored such a beautiful, wonderful person. I love her and being around her makes life better. I’m at the Starbucks that employs her and she’s working right now. She’s such a hottie. 

I have my own apartment now, which is good. The basement I was originally living in when I moved up here wasn’t everything I’d made it out to be in my mind. I’m on the 4th floor in an apartment building which proved useful in the winter because it was warm up there. Now, in the summer it’s proving to be too warm. The other night I slept with the windows open all night and I was still laying on top of the covers. I need to buy myself a fan with my next paycheck because apparently no one believes in air conditioning here. Don’t miss that Vegas heat though, not at all.

The past couple of days have been decent. 

Yesterday, I came close to a final table in one of the early doubles on fulltilt, but after a couple very unlucky hands I ended on 15th. I’m pretty sure after there were 20 of us left I only had a 10bb stack that I nursed. Oh well, it made for a slightly profitable day, and the more days I can chalk in black the closer I am to getting out of make up and into profit. I’m so very happy to have a backer. Even though there’s a weight that comes with having to split everything, without him I wouldn’t be able to play right now. 

Today wasn’t great. I liked how I played, but there weren’t any results. For the most part I had my head on straight and made good decisions. There were a few tournaments where early on I ran queens into kings, I lost aces to jacks and I lost a straight to a rivered flush. After things like that happen so close to one another I can be thrown off a little bit and start making moves that I know aren’t profitable. Today I seemed to hold it together a little better, which either comes from apathy or more volume leads you to expect it. Either way, it’s a constant mind game to try and stay focused. It can be tiresome… and I’m only grinding micros.

Tomorrow is another day. We’ll see what happens.

Well, today was a good day.

I took down a $4.40 pokerstars 180 man sng. Felt good to win another one within a couple weeks, and it gets me closer and closer out of make up.

I’m so grateful for my backing deal. I wouldn’t be able to play without it, and hopefully soon it’ll become my primary source of income. Playing poker for a living would be sick. Soon I’ll be moving up levels and be able to play some of the bigger guarantees on FT and pokerstars. Then I have such a better chance at making some big scores, and ultimately being financially dependent on poker. Again, playing poker for a living would be sick. Dream like.

Anyway, I wanted to get on here and gloat about my success of today, and hopefully I’ll have another win this week. 

Here’s to hoping. 

I had a couple bad days this week. Busted out of things pretty quick. It was really frustrating. It’s not that I was making any huge mistakes, although I was making mistakes, but it felt like every time I was in a pot with someone else they knew they could rape me. I was outplayed, I was sucked out on, and I just got fed up. It’s days like those that make you start to believe that poker is unbeatable. It is beatable, but days like those make you second guess that. I decided to take a couple days and not play.

So I didn’t play yesterday. I went out with a couple friends up here and went bar hopping last night in the Mississippi district here in glorious Portland. Had a good time, tried a few new beers, enjoyed a glass of whiskey and found some delicious $3 hush puppies that are close by. 

There a couple of poker clubs here in Portland, and one of them downtown is having a $500 freeroll. I’m gonna go to that. Check the place out. They have tournaments all week long and they seem to have decent structure. It’d be nice to play live on a semi-regular basis. And hopefully tonight I can win a little extra cash. It’s a live freeroll though, I expect the structure to be fairly shallow. I like how live players don’t really watch how many blinds they have so I start shoving pretty early in shallow live tournaments and it pisses people off. Awesome.

So I was gonna get on here earlier and complain mid grind sesh about how I was getting coolered every other hand, but I didn’t. 

Then I got down to the final table bubble in a $8.80 6-max, 500 cap tourney. When we were down to 8 people I was the chip leader by at least 20 BBs, and I went out 7th. I hadn’t 3bet in over 5 rotations, and I decide to 3bet A9o cause we’re 3 handed. He flats… he fucking flats. I must be crushed right? He’s either got a big pair, or my ace beat. Then the flop comes: A97 all hearts. Well, here we go. He can’t have the ace of hearts, so he probably doesn’t have the flush, and I just beat any big pairs, except for aces, and I beat a bigger ace than mine. So we get all in on the flop, and he turns over K6 of hearts…….. are you kidding me!? Oh well, there goes another possible score to get me out of make-up. Flats with K6s. Really? Variance is a bitch.

Well, had a profitable day anyway. Can’t be too upset. At the beginning of my sesh I was pretty sure I was gonna brick everything. It was nice to run deep in at least one. I’ve got to get to bed soon cause I’m going out to a bar tomorrow night with a friend and I still wanna grind, so it’ll have to be a morning session. Ready for another win, hopefully tomorrow. 

Ugh, now to sleep.

I don’t know where I am. 

I left comfortable surroundings to come to a city I didn’t know much about, and now I spend most days wondering if it was the right decision. I have a couple friends that have made a big move like this and they’re a good resource to talk to. I keep hearing that this will be a good life experience, allows me to grow, etc. Of course, these sound like valid reasons, and will, most likely, make my life better. My insides don’t agree all the time. I wake up in a basement, living with people I don’t know too well, without most of my things, and missing most of the people I used to see on a day to day basis. It’s not the easiest thing to cope with. 

I need to find work, but really I just want to play poker for a living. Today was a rough day. Busted out of everything without a cash. It happens, and I excuse it because I took down a tournament for a couple hundred bucks and it really helped my make up. 

I feel like a child sometimes when it comes to poker. Mainly because my best friend is currently excelling at a fast rate. I wish, so much, to be included in the online poker community, but everyone that talks to my friend would consider me on a lower playing field. I mean, it’s true. I play lower stakes, and I really do need to put the volume in if I want to see results. It’s just tough to play a lot when I’ve only recently moved here and I don’t know a lot of people. I need to be out making friends and seeing the city if I don’t want to feel lonely in the mornings. I know a decent amount of people already, but making plans with people when you’re trying to play mtt’s for a living is tough. I don’t know. 

So we’ll see what happens. I need to take is a day at a time. One step at a time. One tournament at a time.

I ordered food from the grocery store that should be here tomorrow afternoon and that’ll help me grind. I won’t have to worry right before I start playing if I have enough food here at the house because all I can buy is whatever I can fit in my backpack. I’ll probably only have groceries delivered to my house once since I got shipping for free for my first delivery. I’m not paying $10 to have it delivered when I can just convince someone here to drive me there. 

Alright, I’m gonna try and sleep. I’ve got to be up for when the food is being delivered. 

Well…
I’m sitting at the airport here in Vegas. About to board my flight to wonderful Portland, Oregon. This whole life change experience has been exciting. I’m ready to grow up and start something on my own. I’ll miss my family, of course, but I think moving away from home is very important for someone’s life development. I guess.
There have definitely been feelings of worry though. I mean, it’s a big change. If I wasn’t a little nervous I’d think something was wrong. But we’ll see. First thing’s first, I gotta get up there and get a job. I don’t want to living on my fathers dime. The shorter I absolutely have to, the better. The unemployment rate up there is definitely smaller, which is a plus.
We’ll see what happens, but soon enough I’ll be residing in Portland, Oregon :)